(aka Rebecca Blanton)

BDSM/Kink Writer/Performer

Love Letters to a Unicorn

a blog about sex from the submissive position

Episode 12: Connections

Episode 12: Connections

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-in6zm-abed6f Co-Hosts: Auntie Vice and Erica Ambrin Guests: Koe Creation, Ali Yada Guest co-host Erica Ambrin talks to Auntie Vice about music, connecting to people through love, and drops an amazing acapella song. Koe Creation (author, educator) talks about their new memoir This Heart Holds Many which covers their childhood growing up in a polyamours, sex-positive family in the Pacific Northwest. Ali Yada (comic, bubbelologist) talks ab

Bonus Episdoe! NonBinary People on NonBinary Identity

Bonus Episdoe! NonBinary People on NonBinary Identity

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-9dzt3-ab7954 Host: Auntie Vice Guests: Renair Amin and Koe Creation Auntie Vice identifies as agender and Renair Amin and Koe Creation identify as genderfluid. These terms are nebulous and not well understood by many people. Hear three nonbinary folks from very different backgrounds discuss what it means to be nonbinary and genderfluid. #culture #LGBTQ #nonbinary #Queer

Decolonizing Beauty

Decolonizing Beauty

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-4bafi-a5edb8 Fat Chicks hosts Auntie Vice and Wendy Lewis interview Mariana Moscosos of the Decolonization Project and Stacey Gee a slam poet exploring ideas of beauty stemming from her heritage. Our conversation covers how the culture of colonizing groups from England, Spain and France changed ideas of gender and sexuality, language and ideas of beauty. Guests discuss ways they have unlearned problematic ideas of beauty and work to emb

Episode 9: 40!!!

Episode 9: 40!!!

https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-gpaia-9ee5de 40!!! Guests: Evie Vane (author, blogger) and Tina Hayes (Belly Dancer/Model) Auntie Vice and guest co-host CharRon Smith discuss their feelings on turning 40 and what they have discovered now that they both passed that milestone. Evie Vane discusses her award-winning book Bondage for All Bodies, discovering kink after 40, and her work in the bondage community. Tina Hayes discusses how the body positive movement has impacted

Free the Pussy, Free the World

Free the Pussy, Free the World

I have spent nearly 30 years working in political activism. My graduate work in political psychology focused on identity, education and political involvement. I have worked from inside and outside movements. There is one thing I have seen consistently: Sexually empowered women are the most powerful force in the world. Most cultures around the world have a lot of stigma and shame they train into women. Making us ashamed of our bodies, our sexuality, our desires and our needs w

Is Non-Binary the Future of Gender?

Is Non-Binary the Future of Gender?

News headlines are floating around about 20 percent of Millennials identifying as “non-binary.” This is based on a new study by GLAAD working with Harris Poll which looks at acceptance of sexual and gender identities. The initial headlines caught my attention because most news outlets framed this as “20 percent of Millennials identify as non-binary.” This is actually a huge number when you start to think about it. Even lumping together the different non-binary identities (e.g

Hef, Playboy, & American Sex

Hef, Playboy, & American Sex

With the passing of Hugh Hefner today, lots of sex writers and educators are reflecting on his influence on their lives and work. It is undeniable that Playboy has shaped the ideas of women, sex, and beauty for a huge percentage of Americans since it began publication in 1953. It has peppered the landscape of American sex for the better part of 70 years and has impacted American’s ideas of sex in ways few other magazine’s ever have. My introduction to Playboy was not traditio

Get Out of Your Head!

Get Out of Your Head!

I want to address the apparently growing trend of discovering and practicing kink without connecting to actual humans you are not having sex with. I have recently come across a couple of articles [here and here] about the increased exposure of kink to the mainstream. I have also experienced a surge in people contacting me online. When I ask them what munches or groups they participate with, they say none- they do kink in private. Please keep in mind, I write the following ful

Pronoun Wars, Part II

Pronoun Wars, Part II

The other night I was at a poetry open mic billed as a “safe space” for the LGBTQAII community. As per the norm in such spaces, the host was asking each person who signed up what their preferred pronouns were. This has become common practice in a lot of queer and sex positive spaces. I gave her my honest answer, “I don’t care.” My partner was in line behind me to sign up. The host asked him the same question. He replied “male” but after walking away, said he was very offended

On Being “Beautiful Ugly”

On Being “Beautiful Ugly”

Guest Author: Joie de Vivre Joie de Vivre is a the co-producer of Peepshow in San Francisco and a burlesque performer. She regularly performs with the Hubba Hubba review and other troupes. I have been a huge admirer of hers for some time. She graciously agreed to be a guest blogger about being beautiful ugly. You can find Joie at on Facebook. Not everyone gets to be beautiful, and I’m one of them. That isn’t self-hatred, it’s statistics — a few of us are beautiful, a few of u

Talking to Fat Girls About Your Body

Talking to Fat Girls About Your Body

I am a fat girl. I have been for a long time. I don’t mince words or try and elide the fact that I am fat. I am okay with it. Most people are not. Most of my friends are fit to very fit. Its partly living in Northern California. Its partly hanging out with burlesque and roller derby girls and rock climbing guys. I can keep up with some, but not all during hiking, running and the like. I wear a bikini in public. I get naked on stage. I sunbathe naked. I love all of this. I gen

Should Kink Assimilate?

Should Kink Assimilate?

Kink, in many forms, is now more popular and more visible than ever. I knew we had gone mainstream when American Dad, Family Guy and even Raising Hope had kink references in the shows that aired during Prime Time without additional warnings. Pretty much every mainstream magazine has covered BDSM and kink: Playboy, Glamour, Cosmo, Vogue, GQ, and now even Redbook. Is this a good thing? I am not so sure the mainstreaming of kink is a good thing. Part of this is being part of the

On Certainty

On Certainty

At some point in the last decade culture in the United States started demanding that people be certain about everything. We collectively lost the capacity to allow grey areas, to question our believes and understandings, and to change. I noticed this first in the political world. The parties stopped negotiating and became set in the quicksand of political certainty. When I started in politics 25 years ago, elected would negotiate, would reach across party lines to do good wor

On Certainty

On Certainty

At some point in the last decade culture in the United States started demanding that people be certain about everything. We collectively lost the capacity to allow grey areas, to question our believes and understandings, and to change. I noticed this first in the political world. The parties stopped negotiating and became set in the quicksand of political certainty. When I started in politics 25 years ago, elected would negotiate, would reach across party lines to do good wor

Do It For the Children! Media Representation

Do It For the Children! Media Representation

What is portrayed in the popular media makes a big difference. Not a profound statement, but most people- even those who agree- often don’t wonder how big of an impression popular media has on our self conception. SOME STATS Forensic science, like most science fields used to be dominated by men. In the past 15 years however, women have taken over this field to the amazing statistic of 90 percent of grad students in 2009 were women. A statistic that is not even close to any o

Do It For the Children! Media Representation

Do It For the Children! Media Representation

What is portrayed in the popular media makes a big difference. Not a profound statement, but most people- even those who agree- often don’t wonder how big of an impression popular media has on our self conception. SOME STATS Forensic science, like most science fields used to be dominated by men. In the past 15 years however, women have taken over this field to the amazing statistic of 90 percent of grad students in 2009 were women. A statistic that is not even close to any o

Masculinity

Masculinity

I have been overwhelmed by the number of stories in the past few weeks about the horrors brought about by men who did not feel like they were “men.” On Thursday, a man stabbed a woman and slit her throat, killing her, on a train in Chicago because she turned down his advances. The Republicans voted to allow people on the No Fly List to continue to access guns unabated. And of course, Orlando. I know, you may not see the obvious connection between these events and men feeling

Masculinity

Masculinity

I have been overwhelmed by the number of stories in the past few weeks about the horrors brought about by men who did not feel like they were “men.” On Thursday, a man stabbed a woman and slit her throat, killing her, on a train in Chicago because she turned down his advances. The Republicans voted to allow people on the No Fly List to continue to access guns unabated. And of course, Orlando. I know, you may not see the obvious connection between these events and men feeling

Sex-First! Polyamory Culture

Sex-First! Polyamory Culture

First, let me get a few things in the open (if you are not already familiar). One, I like sex. I like it a lot and believe it should be talked about, enjoyed and celebrated. Two, I have had a few slutty moments in my life, and I am not above a one-night-stand. HOWEVER, I can’t stand the “sex first!” culture fostered in several communities I have been a part of. By sex-first, I don’t mean sex positive. Sex positive is enjoy, and embracing and respecting sex and sexuality. Sex-

Sex-First! Polyamory Culture

Sex-First! Polyamory Culture

First, let me get a few things in the open (if you are not already familiar). One, I like sex. I like it a lot and believe it should be talked about, enjoyed and celebrated. Two, I have had a few slutty moments in my life, and I am not above a one-night-stand. HOWEVER, I can’t stand the “sex first!” culture fostered in several communities I have been a part of. By sex-first, I don’t mean sex positive. Sex positive is enjoy, and embracing and respecting sex and sexuality. Sex-